As I have mentioned in my previous few posts I am in themidst of trying to write a 50000 word novel by the end of the month for Nanowrio, so I am not paying attention to my blog, though I should have a new movie post in december some time. Instead of new content I have been posting things I wrote over a year ago for Reddit under their writing prompt sub reddit; well here is another one of those! the prompt for this one was "The latest target of an obsessive serial killer turns out to be immortal" so here is my attempt at it. With all of these prompts I gave myself an hour to come up with a concept and write it, if I had more time and space some of these would be vastly different I am sure, but nonetheless enjoy.
Jackson spotted his victim walking out of the 7-11. The man fit his credentials: about 6 foot, thin, mustached, brown haired—all the features of his first victim and sexually abusive step father. He followed the man’s Honda Civic until it parked in front of a small bungalow on the out skirts of town.
“Gun?” Jackson asked himself.
“No, the last one was a gun. Have fun with this one, use the knife make it slow and painful.” He answered his own question.
“Sounds good.” Jackson grabbed a steak knife from his glove compartment and stepped out of his Ford Pint. He took a deep breath of the crisp fall air. He watched as lights turned on inside the bungalow.
He watched as a figure moved about the house. Here pulled out a black and white photo from his pocket, “All this could have been avoided, I was sane before you.”
“Sane? Are you kidding me?” He grew angry with himself, “You were never sane, remember that time you hung your dog with a rubber hose from your neighbor’s oak tree?”
“But that was a dog. I wouldn’t have killed people if he hadn’t stuck his thing in me.”
“Maybe, but sane is not a word to describe you.”
“Shut up, what do you know anyway?” Jackson slapped himself, “This guy looks like him and needs to pay for what he did.” Jackson tucked his step father’s photo back into his pocket and headed across the lawn with the knife in his hand. He opened the door and crept into the living room. The man he followed there was sitting on a couch watching a video of two kittens on his laptop.
“You enjoying that?” Jackson asked.
“As a matter of fact I was.” The man stopped the video and turned around to look at who was speaking to him. Jackson was a pudgy man whose hair was always looked as though he was wearing a hat even when he wasn’t. His glasses were a size too small and laid awkwardly on his face.
“Cats are funny.” Jackson said with a shy smile.
“Stop chitchatting, he isn’t your friend. He sexually assaulted you, moron.” Jackson shouted.
“Uh, can I help you?” the man inquired as he stood up and rounded the couch to stand in front of Jackson.
“Just do it already!”
“I think you should get out of my house.”
“Not until I kill and dismember you.”
“Oh, that’s all? Will it be for any particular reason?”
“You put your stick in my wazzoo!” Jackson started crying.
“Ah.” The man paused, “I mean over these centuries I’ve stuck my stick in quite a few wazzoo’s, and it’s hard to keep track of them all, but I think I would remember stooping to a wazzoo as hideous as yours.”
“It was you!”
“In fact most of the wazzoos I was in were woman, though there was that time me and Pontius Pilate experimented. He was gay, I wasn’t. it broke his heart, that’s why he was so tough on Jesus I think."
Jackson plunged the knife into the man’s stomach.
“Fuck. That hurts.”
“It won’t for long, I would say ask my stepfathers doppelgangers, but they aren’t alive.”
Jackson pulled the knife out and stood there smiling as he recounted his victims.
“Well, I mean, have you picked up on any context clues yet?” The man sarcastically asked.
“Context clues?” Jackson rubbed his head in confusion.
“Context clues idiot, you know what they are. Stop hesitating and kill him already!”
“No, you see, tell your other self I can’t be killed. I’m immortal.”
Jackson paused before stabbing the knife into the man’s stomach again.
“You are not getting it. Did your stepfather fuck you in the ear and give you brain damage too?”
Jackson grew angry and stabbed the man over and over again.
“Are you done?” The man pulled the knife out and held it to his side, “good, listen I’m story your step dad fucked your fanny, but I can’t be killed. I’m like highlander, but way more badass because I am the last one, and as you may or probably don’t know there can only be one and I’m him.”
Jackson stabbed and stabbed, yet the man stood there unfazed.
“So, I mean I can’t be killed. I have the power of thousands of immortals. Even if my head gets cut off I still live, I mean it probably wouldn’t be a fun existence, but I’ll still be alive. I’ll give you a chance to leave, but I swear to god if you stab me again I’ll kill you.”
“You’re not immortal, that’s fake.”
“Of course it is Jackson, just cut his throat already you moron!”
“Jackson, I wouldn’t do that.” The man sighed.
Jackson stabbed the man again, twisted the knife several times and pulled it out again.
“I warned you.” The man ripped the knife from Jackson’s hand and slit his throat blood splattered across the man’s face as Jackson fell to the ground. The man dropped the knife and sat back down on his couch. He picked up his lap top and hit play on the video.
“You’re right, cats are funny.”
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