An AMA of Madness

Last night something absolutely wonderful happened in the internet world: Tommy Wiseau did an AMA on Reddit. 

For those of you of you who do not know who Mr. Wiseau is (though I learned during his AMA that he does not like to be called Mr. Wiseau), he is the brilliant idiotic mind behind the cult film The Room.

Still unsure? I’ll help you out.

First a picture of the myth that is Tommy Wiseau:

Now, let me briefly talk about The Room which is regarded by many as the worst movie ever made.Though it is really bad it is at least a film I can enjoy in its horribleness, unlike the film I consider the worst ever made, Miss March. Tommy Wiseau wrote, produced, directed, and starred in The Room. All of which he did just wonderfully  horridly. His use of the camera and knowledge of making a movie were just so poor that it gives me confidence that if I were to make a movie it would be better than this. Go visit the official website http://www.theroommovie.com/, Wikipedia it, or find the movie online (or I can lend you my copy of the DVD)

To the man’s credit he had a dream and made that shit happen and that is the dream of every American. And as Tommy Wiseau so dumbly said he is “America.”

Now let us move on to the man himself. There is a lot of mystery behind this guy it is easier to find information about Big Foot than Tommy Wiseau. The most detail we have on him is from Greg Sestero’s (an actor from the film) book The Disaster Artist, which as we speak is being turned into a movie by James Franco. But even that gives us small details into where this guy came from. There are many theories of who he is, but two that I am partial to:

1. He is a vampire (which he sort of addresses below)
2. He is D.B. Cooper. Mr. Wiseau denied it but I don’t buy it at all look at this comic drawn by some random guy on the internet: 

This drawing sold me on the fact that he is D.B. Cooper, I mean it just has to be the explanation to everything It just has to be true right?

Fine, whatever, let me move on here.

I decided to try and pick some of my favorite answers from this AMA, but there was so many more I didn't pick and you can read through this thing in its entirety over on Reddit if you have that kind of time. The questions are in Bold and the answers are in standard text. If you are new to the world of Wiseau, you may be confused at some of the questions, but after you watch the movie it will all make sense. Enjoy.

Please note I did not alter any of the grammar or spelling in Tommy’s answer: the guy can’t spell or speak or really do much of anything.

What do you make of the mystery around your origins? Are you surprised?

Well, you know, we're all curious. We all live in America, and we are all curious bout people, who they are, where they come from. I'm very private person, I keep that way, that's my choice. I am America, I keep that way. Thank you for asking that.

Where does your accent originate from?

I speak two languages. I have no idea, to be honest with you. It is what it is.

Mr. Wiseau,

I am getting married in the near future and already have plans to throw a football around in an alley with my groomsmen. Any pointers on how to keep the game moving and to elicit the best awkward laughs from my groomsman for the videographer to pick up? Also, how can I best avoid injury?

Absolutely. I encourage you to do that number 1. And don't call me Mr. Wiseau, I hate that, but I wish you luck in new direction in my life, and play football before you to go bed, and play football before you drink, before you get tipsy. ABSOLUTELY - be the first one! Send me the clip! Absolutely! An invitation maybe! I wish you luck!

So Tommy, how is your sex life?

I enjoy it erryday!

How are you and Greg these days? Are you guys still good friends?

Well, we talk, but actually, probably, we just released a script, original script, available, THE ROOM, original one, because there was a lot of controversy, agin, I'm sorry for some of you guys in America we call "douchebags" - I've been filming the past 20 years, shame on you who are bashing THE ROOM as well as the actors in THE NEIGHBORS. It is new entertainment, and people reallyreally enjoy it. That's all I'm gonna say, moveonnextquestion

In The Room, it’s pretty clear that the character of Lisa was meant to symbolize temptation and the evil that jealousy between friends and lovers can create. Could you elaborate more on what Lisa’s actions in the film say about our society and the moral degradation of America as a whole?

GREAT Question! First of all, you can compare Lisa to Eleezabeth Taylor, to when she did CLEOPATRA. The ladies, they don't have to wear jeans, they can wear dresses to be very powerful. So Lisa's character is very powerful. She represents American society. So that's my answer. Move on, next one!

How did you make your millions Tommy?

Okay! That's good question! Well first of all - if you look at background, you work hard, you make money. It's no secret, okay? You work VERY hard, you make money. Well I work very hard, 24/7, several days a week, okay? And the specific how I make monies will be in book. THE DISASTER ARTIST by Tommy Wiseau, when I write it soon. Yes.

Tommy, what country were your born in?

I was born on Planet Earth. Moveonnextquestion. And I'm American, and proud of it.

Are you going to write an autobiography? (The neighbors is awesome)

Yes, I am, because as you probably kneow, DISASTER ARTIST is not 100% correct, and some people - again - are very disrespectful of my lief. How dare you to bash me, to say negative things about me and my life when you don't even know me? Shame on you. So yes, absolutely, you know. We in America, you know, we have very dedicate people, from New Orleans, and some of the function that people have are completely disrespectful. Shame on you if you blast my project. We are very dedicated to our art - shame on you, I would say, again! You know who you are! And also you can add, about script, how dare you say that was not the script on the production of THE ROOM. How are you have powers to criticize someone you don't even know? When you say it's not a camera, or we have only this one camera, or this one or that one? Shame on you.

Move on, next question.

Hey, Tommy. Is the character Denny from The Room based on anyone from real life? And what about Claudette?

Oh yeah, we have many Claudettes in the country, with cancer - again, one of the things I like it when people ask why we don't talk about it, yeah, is because someday we have a cure for it. Because it's a very private thing, you know? Many Claudettes in America relate to cancer. Many Dennys, many Johnnys, many Marks, because everything is coming from life, real life. THE ROOM is a red flag for society, for people to do better, to be better to each other basically. I've been doing this for 12 years, saying that.

Thanks a lot for doing this! I have a few questions for youuuu! Jusssst a lil something..

1) In The Room, why was Johnny’s first date with Lisa an interesting story?

2) When Johnny buys Lisa a dozen red roses from the flower store, why does he hold them upside down?

3) Why did you, as the director, re-use shots from both of Johnny’s sex scenes with Lisa?

4) WHY IS MARK SO BUSY?!?!?!

1.) Well, okay, let's... okay. It just WAS because she paid for DINNER, that's the interesting story. Next question.

2.) Oh, because that's a typical situation.

3.) First of all... we have variation in ROOM 1-4, it's not the same shot, at all.

4.) Why is Mark so busy? Why so busy!??! Because of business, like everybody else, hehehe!

Are you a vampire?

No. I'm just a human being like everybody else. But I belieeeve in certain, let's say... destiny. And vampires to a certain degree. So no, I am not a vampire. But I relate to it. Something like that

Hey Tommy, what advice do you have for a writer who is just starting and would like to get into the movie business?

That's good question. I would say, think about 20% FIRST before you get to 100%. If you think about 20%, you will get to 100%. With original material, if people say negatives about you, let it go, move onto something else

Hi Tommy, Are we laughing at you, or with you?.

We are laughing together. Don't listen to douchebags, for GOD'S SAKE! ENJOY-A LIFE!!!!! Relax together!

My question is: If you could give all of politicians of the world just one piece of advice, what would it be?

Eeef a lot of people loved each other, the world would be a better place to live. The advice I would give? Be nice to each other basically.

Why are you so fucking awesome?!!

Well, I love people, and I think people love me. I'm very dedicated you know? I like freedom, I like people who express themselves, and that's what America's all about. I want to create something so people can relate to it. That's why we create neighbors, we create future project. Filmmakers have responsible towards people, you know? So I'm trying to present everything as true as possible, as nice as possible, all negative stuff is as I said before, it's too bad that some people are very disrespectful but it is what it is.

 Thank you Tommy you not knowing much of anything made my week.